


What's in a Name?

by withasideofangst



Series: The Mechanic 'Verse [3]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Iron Man - All Media Types, Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Bad Jokes, Gen, Kid Tony Stark, Not Canon Compliant, Out of Character, Scene Gone Wrong, Sorry Not Sorry, The Author Regrets Nothing, Tony Stark Has Issues, Why Did I Write This?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-21
Updated: 2017-01-21
Packaged: 2018-09-18 22:24:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 229
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9405587
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/withasideofangst/pseuds/withasideofangst
Summary: A bonus chapter for my fic, A Wrench in the Machine.You don't need to have read aWitM to read this.---This is really just a young, slightly evil hacker!Tony utterly screwing with the Avengers by revealing that Bucky Barnes is in Hydra's custody in a very asshole-y way.AKA, "Rejected Scene Idea: The Horrible Name Joke."





	

**Author's Note:**

> Once again, you can read this without having read the original fic.
> 
> This was actually one of the first ideas I had for aWitM when I was still coming up with Tony’s character and his sense of humor (Tony, goddammit, you were always going to be a little bit of a dick). I thought of it, I think after reading a fic where a character mentioned that “Bucky” sounds like a prostitute’s nickname, promptly spat out the thing I was drinking at the time, and wrote down this scene. It was scrapped because my plans for how Steve was found and then how Bucky/Yasha was found changed, and so did much of Tony’s personality. As a result, it’s barely edited, so it’s somewhat different than my normal finished writing.
> 
> (More notes on the original background for this scene in the end notes. I'm not even sorry...)

**_(Immediately after outing Hydra to the Avengers.)_ **

[...]

And then, because he felt like being an asshole, he kept talking.

“These ‘Hydra’ people must be idiots, I think they’re under the impression that prostitutes grow on farms.”

The listening Avengers froze, staring at the speakers from which the hacker’s voice emerged.

“Excuse me?  What the hell gives you that idea?”  Clint asked, while Steve was busy turning an unhealthy shade of red.

“Well, there’s this file,” the kid replied, “and they gave the whole project a dumb codename.”

Clint looked at Natasha, who just shrugged, and motioned for him to keep the hacker talking as they tried to track him.

“What nicknames?”  Clint asked.

”Listen to this-- they named them  _ Bucky Barns _ .”  The kid answered.  “Then even misspelled ‘barns,’ too,” he continued, unaware of how Steve had just crumpled to the ground.  “Added an ‘e’ and everything.”

By the time anyone had pulled themselves together to demand more information, the hacker had already disconnected and their trace once again had failed.

They scrambled around the tower and then SHIELD for hours after that, while the hacker watched through his screens, laughing until he couldn’t breathe and his sides hurt.

He never did anything the easy (read: boring) way if he could help it, and as an added bonus, this would keep the Avengers off his trail for a little while.

**Author's Note:**

> In my initial notes for this bonus chapter, I literally wrote the phrase, “See notes for ‘Bucky Barnes’ rejected name drop idea. AKA Tony, you smartass dickbag...”
> 
> I don’t remember entirely, because this scene never really worked, but the intent was for this to happen when Tony was hacking the Avengers, way in the beginning (the fic would have started with Tony’s first hack, and the Avengers were already formed at that point), and he outed Hydra just before this. Tony, both as a hacker and as Iron Man, would have been quite a bit more like an intelligent Bond villain-- very “bwahaha, mustache twirl mustache twirl, I am manipulating everything from the shadows in my hidden workshop lair.” Iron Man was also definitely still considered a villain, and this Tony was a wee bit more evil (not really, but the last line of this short shows how different his motivations were, since he was willing to use the Winter Soldier as a pawn).
> 
> As fun as it would have been to fulfill my angsty little heart’s desire to play with all your feelings, I’m rather happy with the changes I made, since this bit went off the rails because Tony and Yasha’s friendship didn’t really work with this scene, which was one of the many reasons the story changed so much.


End file.
